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8 {. S% C- {4 I$ x4 g, TTahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今日圣诞，老猫先祝大家圣诞快乐，虽然是洋人的节日：）下午贾陆英老师继续在老秘网4 ]$ T: d% Y+ [/ V# E' Y: O0 Qmso-font-kerning:0pt">QQ& [& S/ ?0 U; }+ Q( D- Afont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
: O( @" C9 _) U: `mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">群“重温经典读书会”49231471辅导我们学习《论语》。贾陆英老师一直记挂着我们这群“大学生”，原本这节课是安排在周三下午的，但贾老师届时另有要事，所以今日上午便特地在群里发出预告，提前到今日下午开课。有此良师，夫复何求？闲话少叙，立即把上课实录整理奉上。; g/ b6 ~/ V. c% n1 R, [! Pmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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: r; F) ?, K: q/ }% } H8 J& Wmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">贾陆英：& b6 T! l* J. j) h. N: Nmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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7 X2 H. Y7 v/ T6 D3 r$ Jmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今天下午，我们学习讨论《论语》为政篇第+ c, n3 D, b [9 f
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4 l1 k0 P( s" W5 vmso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子问孝，子曰：8 G9 j# t9 b9 E( K2 t+ u t! Y9 N* imso-font-kerning:0pt">“) f. D p; d% k% I) D
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! ?" ` |' f5 B& C5 [ e9 fmso-font-kerning:0pt">无违。* L3 g, D7 h! W* I3 Y# |& {mso-font-kerning:0pt">”6 Q1 D: i% W5 K5 X1 [+ kmso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;
7 W! H; I* ^# \2 Q! Rmso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟御，子告之曰：, |6 p4 v0 u/ b
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: ]. }+ l6 L7 @5 _; t9 b. \2 I1 Ymso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问孝于我，我对曰无违。4 d5 _- C$ _( R, T( t" bcolor:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”/ X* t+ i) o5 J r$ Y1 STahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;
, w" s- I: D% q9 B2 K' [mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟曰：$ o" z6 c# C- b% Wmso-font-kerning:0pt">“# D4 D+ ?: y5 Q3 P5 [+ Z
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# X* q" J, X# q5 smso-font-kerning:0pt">子曰：& T: P) } B O$ u: lmso-font-kerning:0pt">“8 q, Y) w, c% |6 ]$ J2 o* l3 x" k! Ymso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;
2 w9 w7 P) {0 Q. f5 w5 h: i' m5 e: dmso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼；死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。$ F4 A2 D$ A: o
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4 `' ?* P; D: o2 ]2 vmso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子：鲁国大夫，三家之一，姓仲孙，名何忌，懿是谥号。他的父亲孟僖子临死时要他向孔子学礼。无违：不要违背礼。樊迟：孔子的学生，名须，字子迟，比孔子小四十六岁。御：驾驶马车。孟孙：指孟懿子。# d6 B! x7 T( c8 i1 \1 {
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% t6 `7 Y F1 U5 d. m- t kmso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子请教孔子什么是孝，孔子说：$ \) l& \: t8 n& s5 S. n10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">“: C+ |: S! i6 `. a0 R- ]
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">一天，樊迟给孔子驾车，孔子告诉他说：3 P$ a& F; N2 p, w4 f9 y
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问我什么是孝，我回答他说不要违背礼。( e5 |3 B1 T) [1 B7 \* B1 \mso-font-kerning:0pt">"0 t0 z2 a$ M1 N4 Q( Q
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, s8 @1 P8 x6 w4 T2 W0 y. a$ Y- |- ~mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟说：. b! j& c5 [: J+ u
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">这是什么意思呢" M7 S) e; Y; d6 |% {
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6 ^; l: }* s0 y( ^; @mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孔子说：: t4 K/ w% B* Amso-font-kerning:0pt">"9 Q: h2 [! ?& U1 p; |7 w2 bfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;. d6 Z$ L! W! b' A* }1 w0 Y1 U
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母活着的时候，要按礼侍奉他们；父母死了，要按礼来埋葬他们，祭祀他们。2 T/ S* \0 H% Q, n+ ]
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2 v5 y7 x7 R6 p4 W/ I8 U4 Gmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：怎样理解孝就是4 f) ^6 T, X0 O2 R( B10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">“# z9 @. x$ G+ _, B' s1 {7 Q) Jfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
' `5 W- d/ e; xmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违# H' k1 W5 f% K) A9 T( {10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”$ ?, M3 n l/ D, f% Z/ ?' O" F
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">答：孔子教人是很讲针对性的。孟懿子不能遵从他父亲贤而好礼之教，所以孔子针对他讲得% ?8 H/ S. k" W) t* jmso-font-kerning:0pt">“& p) A/ P9 B/ z1 ~: K, g4 v
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，就是不要违背父亲的教诲，这是就具体情况所做的回答。但是就普遍事理而言，孔子讲; ?3 d+ A$ \* W; R R3 b
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; X3 S) [8 }- Z% lmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，强调要以礼事亲，不可违背于礼，- k7 E8 x/ H: ~; @' f, X
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1 k f3 e: i9 u6 h# Q" Wmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。& z2 j7 J% L+ }/ [! z, v+ xmso-font-kerning:0pt">”3 h# C* }' d6 u
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8 h! G$ N* ^; B4 E) J9 K+ omso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母在世，如有不合乎礼的言行，子女是不应当顺从的，而要以合乎礼的方法劝谏，这是对父母真正的爱护、尊敬。孝的精神，还应当体现在父母去世以后，要按照礼制去安葬他们、祭祀他们，这才算子女尽孝有始有终。4 C! G7 V" M3 W+ N0 n- G* Omso-font-kerning:0pt">
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, c+ y, z9 }& M+ [1 S3 C- ymso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：为什么说以礼事亲才是孝？: w2 O5 X3 l: P. f: J, J) K: g5 s `
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4 }4 I k" o; |+ s2 Omso-font-kerning:0pt">答：本章谈孝的重点是，孝要落实到礼上。孔子讲仁与礼的关系，一方面强调仁是礼的核心，礼应当体现仁的精神；另一方面又强调，礼的规定体现了仁的要求，依礼而行就是仁。据此，是否做到了孝，要以是否依礼而行来衡量。2 V5 c |0 J) I1 A* C+ W0 Z
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2 K6 E L' {# Z A8 c3 Vmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">小风飕飕地：: z0 w0 E0 E- f3 }
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！反过来说，虽然礼遇有加未必出于心敬，但若是不加礼遇那就一定是心不敬，也就是不孝啦。所以外在的礼对于孝来说很重要，如若无礼那必然是不孝！对父母尽孝道，是义+ n$ q2 t3 A/ ^2 B1 S
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7 Y5 A; M+ K* K; l/ l6 F1 K2 tTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！: O/ L2 _9 X" U' E" m* B0 j) e5 A
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/ W; _( \; A1 ^mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">赞同。孝的本质，是发自内心的对父母的恭敬和感恩之情。有此心，才会有孝行。5 y. z Z5 m0 k, Y: v+ b
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">贾老，昨天晚生正好读到战国时期儒家关于礼、丧、祭的论述+ h" G; G( E9 ~$ d8 l
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。对父母的孝，绝对不能行功利主义，现在社会上很多人在父母有能力的时候，和颜悦色，等到父母年迈无力，不能给自己帮上什么了，就放弃赡养父母，这是一种巧言令色，有所图谋。这三点做到都是不简单的，先说不违，能够做到遵循父母的教导，按照父母意愿行事之人有几？晚生做不到，起码现在说，不孝有三无后为大，父母成天逼婚，依旧违背了。老吾老以及人之老啊' g3 G; }; Z$ U2 ^& ^2 t+ @mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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3 [& q! H- R1 UTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。现在社会中，生前不依礼事亲，死后大操大办的现象很普遍，成为了陋习，也造成了很大的负担。6 @( _( h( W8 b# `- E0 g
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孝经
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。$ O- o6 _* ?; r* P( qmso-font-kerning:0pt">——* M' h- }9 V- e1 l8 E8 ], z
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对，这是从情感上关心父母，是尽孝的重要内容。生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。 r6 H- n; v9 L% Q0 K
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。《孝经》说：2 z4 F" B4 |7 q' T* xmso-font-kerning:0pt">“7 ]# c1 @' y, v7 D7 c n' @
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼者，敬而已矣。故敬其父，则子悦；敬其兄，则弟悦；敬其君，则臣悦；敬一人，而千万人悦。所敬者寡，而悦者众，此之谓要道也。8 ~- v B# O* i: k2 p/ }* r
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼的内在依据是孝悌，而外在表现，就是一个! u4 q0 C* ]+ u4 X- a ]0 p. |mso-font-kerning:0pt">“7 `3 U: T Z) T; m7 Z
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9 Z. r2 Z L! F3 d5 rmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">字。所以，如能尊敬他的父亲，那么其儿子就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的兄长，那么其弟弟就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的国君，那么其臣下就会喜悦。尊敬的是一个人，却能使千万人喜悦。所敬者虽然只是少数，而喜悦的人却有千千万万，这就是为什么把推行孝悌之道和礼乐教化称为# t' D4 O0 ~+ d* m% g) x
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/ X+ h; Y$ y- g1 qmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">要道5 }9 _8 |6 q H: ^( |
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">的意义所在啊。' ]# m8 U+ E# X; D+ }2 A4 g5 h- _
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9 P1 q( |& E T9 K# {4 C* O6 oTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">嗯，这就是不孝有三的第一种。事谓阿意曲从，陷亲不义，一不孝也。我们通常将的孝顺的. K; B, I b( B
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">其实就是不违的意思" s* _& Z% X# Z
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